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A Lady’s Guide to Surviving the Man-Cold

Kelly Fields
3 min readJan 31, 2019

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Photo by Brittany Colette on Unsplash

When man colds attack, women fight back!

Strap on your big girl panties, it’s gonna be a bumpy ride! Your man has a cold, which means the dreaded man-cold has invaded your happy home. Not to worry, there is no reason to lock yourself away in your safe room with copious amounts of wine and Netflix just yet. You can survive this! Your man may even too if you follow these simple suggestions:

When your man says he’s dying, he’s not. Just smile and nod, maybe pat his head if the mood strikes you. Do not lash out in anger and begin a diatribe on how the last time you had a cold you still had to go to work, come home and cook dinner, do the laundry, and clean the house. I repeat do not do this! Get yourself a glass of wine or a large chunk of chocolate and in your head just repeat the Bee Gees song Stayin’ Alive… because that’s the goal for both of you.

You may find your man reverts back to childhood and begins to mistake you for his mother. You are not his mother! When he asks for chicken soup with the little star-shaped noodles and crustless toast draw the line in the sand, girl. Draw it! Just smile and say, “Sure honey,” then grab whatever dusty jar of Campbell’s that’s been lying in the back of the pantry since your last stomach flu (that I’m sure you worked through) and plop that gelatinous blob of condensed salts into a…

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Kelly Fields
Kelly Fields

Written by Kelly Fields

Kelly Fields is a reader, writer, cake decorator, and knitter living out her dreams one day at a time.

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